Image copyright © by Marcus Trahan

Sisters

(2016)

Wow. You trust that Tina Fey and Amy Poehler will give you some great comedy. They have both done so in the past, repeatedly. So you rent this piece of shit. And I’m being kind calling it that. I was stunned at how bad it was. Somehow it managed to get a 6.1 from viewers at the IMDb, but I browsed through the first two pages there and found only two favorable reviews. The rest … “Cringing.” “Terrible.” “Just dreadful.” “It may be the worst movie I’ve ever seen.” “Really bad OMG.” “It cost me nothing to see this movie…..and I got my money’s worth.” “Just plain stupid.”

Fey and Poehler are (surprise!) sisters who learn that their parents are selling the house they grew up in. They go ballistic! That’s about it. They are among the most narcissistic, entitled, childish, grasping, tantrum-throwing (literally; at one point Fey throws herself to the ground and has a fit) thoroughly unlikable characters I have ever encountered outside of an Adam Sandler movie. They decide to throw a farewell party, invite all their high school friends. I assume that by the end they will have learned some sort of life lesson. I read that the “comic high point” will be when they totally destroy the house. I didn’t stick around that long. I had my fill of these terrible bitches at about the forty minute mark.

What I can’t get over, what really made my jaw drop, was the complete lack of comic timing from these two talented pros. At least six times in the part I watched, a joke was drawn out at least a minute after it stopped being funny, and most of them weren’t all that fucking funny to begin with. No timing at all! Just characters repeating the same thing over and over until I want to scream. I will try not to let this abomination influence me when I see the next Tina Fey or Amy Poehler movie coming down the pike, but it’s not going to be easy. It cost me $1.63 at Redbox!