Patriots Day

The first of two films about the Boston Marathon bombings. Slated to come out later this year is Stronger, starring Jake Gyllenhaal and Tatiana Maslany. That one will focus on one real-life couple: Jeff Bauman, who lost both his legs, and his girlfriend Erin Hurley. This one attempts to tell the larger story of what happened from the bombing itself to the killing and/or apprehension of those contemptible pieces of human garbage, the Tsarnaev brothers, piece of shit Dzhokhar, who was run over and killed (hooray! I have a picture of his mangled corpse that I treasure) by his piece of shit brother, Tamerlan, now on Death Row, an excellent place for him. May his stay there be short but extremely unpleasant. Too bad he’s not in the general population.

I suppose the film’s heart is in the right place, but that really doesn’t excuse the deep dishonesty of making up a character, a Boston cop played by Mark Wahlberg, who is there at every critical point in the hunt for the bombers, from the finish line to the capture. Not only that, but he is usually the only person present who does not have his head up his ass. Which is a terrible insult to the hundreds of men and women who worked their butts off to bring these assholes down, don’t you think? Really, skip this stinker.