House of Wax

If you watch any TV at all, you will be familiar with Geico. Over the last decade or so they have had seven or eight different ad campaigns, starting with Ned the Banker (“Lost another loan to Geico!”), and going through many more, each one, incredibly, more stupid than the last. The worst of them all is that fucking gecko with the accent (Cockney? Aussie? Why?), the reptile I would most ... Read more »

Housesitter

Here’s of those romantic comedies Hollywood used to be able to do so effortlessly, but mostly does badly these days. I wonder if we’ve seen half a dozen of them that actually worked in the last decade? Maybe. This one works gloriously. Goldie Hawn is one of our favorites, dating all the way back to the days of “Laugh-in.” She doesn’t work enough; she hasn’t had a screen credit since 2002. ... Read more »

How I Live Now

Daisy (Saoirse Ronan) arrives at a highly militarized Heathrow Airport in England from America. There is some sort of terrorist crisis going on. She stays with her cousins in the country as their mother is off to Geneva for a “peace conference.” At first she hates it, but soon develops a crush on Eddie.

Then a nuclear weapon is exploded in London. Hundreds of thousands dead, ... Read more »

How I Won the War

Oh, my, how long I have waited to see this film again. It has never been available in NTSC video, but I stumbled on this at Movie Madness (“The Biggest Video Store in the World!”) in a PAL version that the clerk said would play on my Blu-Ray. And it did.

I’m not saying it’s a masterpiece. It isn’t. But I am a huge fan of Richard Lester, and this was the only film of his I hadn’t ... Read more »

How the West Was Won

Before there was IMAX, there was Cinerama. In some ways it was even better than IMAX. It was shot with three cameras, and projected onto a special curved screen only in dedicated Cinerama theaters. The screen took up 146 degrees, which meant that if you sat in the center of the theater, it totally filled your field of vision. There was a seven-channel sound system, this before other ... Read more »

How to Beat the High Co$t of Living

It’s a good idea, that really should have been funnier than it is. Susan Saint James, Jane Curtin, and Jessica Lange are housewives who are all in financial trouble for one reason or another. They hatch a scheme to rob a “money globe” filled with real bills, a promotional stunt for a large shopping center. I can guarantee you that a very big percentage of the residents of Eugene, Oregon, ... Read more »

How To Draw a Bunny

Ray Johnson was a member of that group of beatnik avant-gardists that began as starving artists in the early ‘50s and eventually ended up millionaires like Roy Lichtenstein and Christo, who appear in this film, and Andy Warhol, who doesn’t, being dead. Johnson never achieved the success of his peers. He was primarily a collagist, and his work is interesting, but way too deliberately dense. ... Read more »

How to Get Ahead in Advertising

Richard E. Grant is a totally cynical and ruthless ad exec in London. He claims he knows how to sell anything, but for some reason a new campaign for an as-yet-unnamed pimple cream has him stymied. And then a boil appears on his shoulder. Yuck, right? But even worse, this boil has a face, and keeps growing. It begins to speak to him. He is institutionalized, but when he comes out he’s even ... Read more »

How to Kill Your Neighbor’s Dog

No dogs were harmed in the making of this movie. In fact, Kenneth Branagh didn’t actually kill the dog. It’s all about the angst of a playwright who has been unable to duplicate his early successes. It never really amounts to anything, except for a while when he is learning to know and like his young neighbor (Suzi Hofrichter, who was 11 years old then). The girl is very good, and an ... Read more »

How to Lose Friends and Alienate People

In the last decade Simon Pegg has become one of my favorite comic actors and writers. In addition to great comedy films like Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz and Paul he has done very well for himself by becoming part of the Mission Impossible and Ice Age ... Read more »