Noah

Did you know that Noah had helpers when building the Ark, in the form of animated rock monsters bigger than elephants? Did you know that thousands of angry people gathered near the big boat and fought to get in? Did you know that, after the animals were all loaded, two by two, they were all put to sleep for forty days and forty nights, so Noah and his family wouldn’t have to feed them and muck out the decks? Did you know that Noah, after the deluge lifted the big tub onto the briny, decided that they should be that last humans, and was serious enough about it to try to kill his newborn grandchild?

I didn’t, either. This is one of the weirdest movies you will ever see, certainly the weirdest with a budget this big. And I can actually recommend it on just that basis. Your jaw will drop. Was that in the Bible? The SFX are quite good, and the big battle is well done. But you have to wonder what possessed Darren Aronofsky, whose previous credits include Black Swan and The Wrestler, to make this pseudo-Biblical epic. And who read the proposal and decided to fund it.